Dear Sriman Hrday Krishna dasa,
Please accept my humble obeisances in remembrance of my Divine Masters.
Prabhu, I have read the email you just sent me [Dated 3/13/19]. Because of the differences in our two languages there is some difficulty in fully understanding each other’s positions and perspectives.
As much as I can understand, however, you are living in a state of spiritual confusion with no clear direction for proceeding in the line of your Gurudeva, Srila Govinda Maharaja.
As a substitute for a clear path of devotional service under the guidance of a higher Vaishnava, you say things like this:
I serve Srila Prabhupada and other Vaisnavas in ISKCON.
I’ve been singing at ISKCON for several years and I’m currently the pujari there. I have been serving the deities for more than 5 years.
These are the kinds of expressions I would expect to hear from a kanishtha adhikari, one who sees Krishna as all-in-all but does not understand He cannot be served directly; He can only be served by serving His pure devotees.
You also wrote:
Acarya Maharaj has given me his blessings and told me that he is “very happy for the services I do”.
“[T]he services I do . . . .” According to my understanding, “the services” you do are those activities performed by you in a state of spiritual bewilderment. And yet, you seem satisfied living in that state of consciousness because Sripada Acharya Maharaja has blessed you to continue moving about in that haphazard way, which makes spiritual progress almost impossible or, at best, very slow.
If you are satisfied with this way of living, what more can I say?
I hope I do not bother you but this is my version of things.
Prabhu, you do not bother me. I am a servant of the devotees of Sri Sri Guru Gauranga. If I can be of some service to you it will be good for me.
I pray this finds you well in health and spirits.
Swami B.K. Giri